Truffle Kerfuffle.

Don’t mess with your food processor when you’re wearing a new white tank top* and dealing with dark chocolate.

Don’t try to get all strongman-competitor-like when the spinny blade thing won’t come out (which then means the whole goddamned bowl won’t come off the actual machine itself); don’t wrestle with the blade unless you want a bloody hand and a stained shirt. It’s best to do what I did- go with the flow and scrape the goodness of your Dark Chocolate Banana Truffles out onto your pan like it’s a totally normal thing to have to turn your processor on its side all awkwardly on your kitchen counter.

Lesson learned: don’t take the blade out of your processor until you’re sure you’re good to go, until you’re sure your food has been sufficiently processified. This truffle goo basically turns into truffle glue if caught up in the insides of the blade**- so don’t think you’re done, remove the blade, and start to pour and then realize you forgot to scrape the edges of the bowl and that you have little banana chunks going on that really should be incorporated into the rest of the insanely smooth truffle goo. The bottom line is that you don’t get a second chance to process your truffles after you’ve disemboweled the bowl.

* Wondering why I’m a total idiot for wearing a new white tank top while wrestling with dark chocolate? Yeah, I see where you’re coming from. It all harks back to that irrational thought process I have when it comes to baking, where I think I can start something, like truffles, and be done in just a few minutes with just one bowl and hardly any mess made at all. I can usually fake it when The Husband asks with a hint of concern, “you’re starting a baking thing? How long is it going to take you?”, because I really believe it when I say “oh! Don’t worry- this is like a four minute thing- I just have to finish toasting the coconut/ mashing this banana/ melting the white chocolate / piping this icing/ rolling out the dough/ (you get the idea) and then I’m ready. Are YOU ready? That’s the question- will I be waiting for YOU in four minutes?”. In 15 minutes, when I’m still in the kitchen not even close to the stage where I’m wiping up my crappy mess with wads of paper towels, I’m avoiding eye contact with him. SO- I was wearing a white tank top when making this recipe because I had just gotten home from work and had a teeny window of time before going out again, and knew I could whip these up because they are irresistibly easy to make. Why change when it’s only going to take 4 minutes to make something? I could have put my World’s Greatest Fudge Brownie Apron on, but didn’t. And it’s not like this disaster is about a stained shirt- it’s not. That will come soon, I am sure.

** Wondering what happened with the stubborn food processor? After lying on its side for a while, like a wounded animal, it gave up the fight and relinquished its chocolate-covered blade. It had truffle glue all up the inside of the blade. A mess I left for the dishwasher to handle, because no one has time to bake and clean in less than 5 minutes.

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September 25th, 2013 | More Sweets Please | 2 Comments | Tags: Disasters